woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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