I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
