I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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