Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
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4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
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Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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