So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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