You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
