Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
