I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
