Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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