Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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