If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
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I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
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Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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