It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
