Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
