what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
