The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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