I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
