do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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