Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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