When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
