its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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