Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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