yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
