think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
