and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
