Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize