summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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