so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
where am i from again
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
