New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize