So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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