That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
