So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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