just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
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If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
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Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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