The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
