it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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