i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
