Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
