NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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