he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
