Don't you send me to vm
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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