You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Green mimosas i think yes
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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