I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
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In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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