i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
if only i could text you this smell
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize