I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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