We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
