god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
