her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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