Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
