I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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