I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
