what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
