names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
