I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
